Macular Degeneration and Me

Low Vision and High Hope

Ups and Downs Part Two

When I wrote the first part of Ups and Downs the trees were just greening and now for part two the trees are ablaze with color ……. an interesting corollary to my life events.  From  two simple cataract operations, to spiking a seriously high blood pressure, from no medications for years, to daily, strong, annoying meds for the blood pressure, glare blindness, to more swelling at the back of both eyes, to dimming of the vision in both eyes, it’s been several months of ups and downs, ins and outs and days tinged with anger, sadness, loneliness and fatigue.  But I Won’t Give Up on me, to paraphrase a popular song, even though skies get rough.

There’s much to do and more to learn on ways to accommodate and acclimate myself to even lower vision.  I’ve already put several things in motion.  For me, doing something is much more energizing than sitting around ruminating about things although sometimes you have to give yourself a shake.

I’ve written my next post already so it won’t be so long next time.  I’ll talk about my latest low vision exam and how I can see my birds at the feeder again.  Stay tuned.


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6 thoughts on “Ups and Downs Part Two

  1. Katharine Emsden on said:

    Always helpful and assuring to hear from you, Pepi. My newer specialist, whom I much prefer, tried eylea even after i reminded him that 5 shots lowered my vision 2 yrs.ago. Same result! Avastin is reliable to maintain & now getting back up. Many different somewhat experimental treatments, it seems,but I don’t go there. I go with driver 170 miles RT. So glad cataract issues now better. writing my book in earnest, while I can. (on Italian, 1678,with LaSalle)

    • Happy to hear from you Katharine. Yes I like Avastin myself. Right now Eyelea seems to be working. I’m experiencing facial recognition problems which are interesting to say the least. See my next post for a good laugh.

      • Katharine Emsden on said:

        Hi again Pepi: For 6 weeks, including latest retina specialist visit, I have instantaneous white flashes, maybe 5 times a week. M.D. says it’s nothing.
        I also changed PCPhysician who massaged/straightened neck above spine and said it might make next presciption less strong! I go to opthalm. next week after 2 years. Both eyes SEEM better, but eylea took best eye V>Acuity from 20:30 down to 20:60 (Aug); Avastin brought it back to 20:50 (sept). Couldn’t get appointment till Dec. (3 months), hoping for 20:40. Keep up all your comments! Katharine

      • Hi, Katharine – with the variety of visual disturbances I’ve had in the past couple of months keeping note of any of them is important, I think, and you should let your ophthalmologist know asap. I get a little antsy when the medical profession tells me something I’m experiencing is ‘nothing.’

        Not speaking medically, I also feel that massage and work on the spine and neck is beneficial. There is still so much to learn about how all parts of the body work together keeping notes on treatments like that and your vision can help you determine next steps.

        For example, my doctor asked me whether my eyes are better in the AM or at other times of the day. These different symptoms help him make better judgement calls for treatment.

        Stay in touch and let me know how you make out.

  2. Pepi, it is good to hear from you and somewhat reassuring to me that there is a community of individuals who can help calm my fears about losing my vision.

    I have lately been dealing with the fatigue brought on from using my eyes too much or less than I normally do. It forces me to take daily naps to rest my eyes after being productive in various ways. But it also deepens my lifelong depression at times, causing me to not want to do ANYTHING.

    Any other alternative suggestions for how I can stay productive without having to take naps every day? Also, how are you dealing with depression at times?

    • Thanks for your comments. I also get fatigued when struggling with vision or glare. On top of that I have these meds for high BP which occurred last year on the day of my first cataract operation and they cause sleepiness. I took my sister’s advice which was to rest. I tired it and sometimes I sleep and sometimes I just keep my eyes closed. It was hard at first but it helped and now I don’t feel guilty or uncomfortable about it. Sometimes you can be more productive after a nap – just think about them as power naps if you can.

      Depression is debilitating. One of the reasons I started this blog was to talk honestly about vision loss and how it makes me feel. Some days I don’t do a good enough job of expressing those feelings. Some days aren’t as good as others, of course, but somehow I’ve been able to reach deep down and get through. I think it’s good to talk about what you experience, not as a complaint but so others have an idea of what low vision is like. I hope I’ve educated some of my family and friends.

      Always love to hear from you. Let me think more about the productivity issue and comment more later. Thanks you.

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